..missing..

its rainng so heavily this noon...

the weather is such unpredictable,just like our life...

one moment it may be shiny,but the very next its turns cloudy and raindrops keep falling...

i wonder why ??

perhaps its time to adapt with the ever-changing life...

things will topple and get upside-down in the next blink of eyes...

so WATCH OUT...~

u will never know at the next moment u may get backstab from anyone...

but who care ?

im not live to please u...

how u feel towards me won't even bother me,as i don't even mind if u dislike me ?

as long don't try to challenge my limits...

im a patient girl,not till u really annoy me,

then u will now what u will get from me..

??

feel that im changing slowly too...

there are many things deep inside my hert..

things that i can't share with others.,things that drive me crazy,

all the sufferings that i have been through,that i have to go through ?

but who know ? and who cares ??

perhaps its the RAIN that turned me feeling so helpless now..

no way, im switching my mood back..

just wish to get back soon...

too bad this  week have to attend a talk...

oh yeah, time flies,

can't believe that i'm steeping into the legal world soon...

entering my degree...

im getting old...?/

missing my family,my heavenly bed,and my babies...

I LOVE ALL OF THEM,MORE THAN ANYTHING...~

...FAKERS AROUND...

its hard to differentiate between  the right

and the wrong one....

human is really hard to predict,reading through their mind,

all of us are actors portraying our own roles,,

so i can assume that fakers are all around...

every morning putting on our masks before leaving,

and here's start the drama....

im really tired with all this...

but , what can i do ?

im eventually turning into one of the fakers...

trying to fit in with this society,

somehow i miss the oldern days..

where life is much more simpler...

but its time to grow stronger and tougher,,

this is the only way to prevent u from being look down and discriminate....

only by being stronger than the others ...

and by having the power...

seem like a dictator,~

ARRGGHH...

somehow feel so bad because of the overloaded tasks...

the assignments,my mid-term and all the tasks...

time is really running out...

but with my dragonboat training,i hardly have enough time to have my own leisure...

out of sudden,feel so emo and alone...

perhaps that's because i miss my family,my puppies,and my lovely bed in my home sweet home...

yeah,I'm really feeling bad this few days,don't mess with me assholes...

but there's the test from the lord,

when I'm in bad mood,there sure be things that drive me mad to the max...

reaching my boiling points...

but who cares now, 
i will just treat all this as challenges..
i don't bother ,,and who do you think u are ??
i won't get mad because of this,as U ARE NOT WORTH IT...~

~teehee~

~things going terribly wrong~

never came across my mind things will be like this...
i really cant figure out what is going on now...
and everything seem to be so wrong now..
the feeling,my emotion,and all the things between us...
and i don't even realise whats wrong between us..
all i can say is,this is not the right one...



not every problems have the solution...
and even if there is an answer,that might be the undefined one..
and now i don't even know what the problem is...
i think this is the scariest part of all..
finding out there's something wrong,but i don't know whats so wrong right now..




I'm so tired with all this....
i just want to be alone now..

i have the feeling that its time to end all this misery...
it wont be too long...

till u really push me to the extent,my limits..
im sorry to say that, but i think its time....
im really tired with all this...
thanks...

~severely~

...SEVERELY...

this song,really sing to my heart....~

FT Island Severely English Translation Lyrics

Letting you go without any expression, as if it's nothing -

I practiced doing that every day but it's still awkward

I also practiced how to secretly cry while smiling but

I feel like my trembling voice will give it away quickly

Loving is probably hundreds and thousands of times more difficult than breaking up

But I'm a fool that can't live without you - what do you want me to do?

Severely, I guess I loved you too severely

I don't even breath and I look around for you

I don't know when I'll be able to stop

Severely, I guess I loved you too severely

I think letting you go is more severe than dying

No matter how much it hurts, every day I practiced

Trying to get used to spending a day as if it's nothing

I don't think I can forget you anyway

Even if I'm sick with an incurable disease

I'm a fool that can't live without you - what do you want me to do?

If this was how it's going to be, I shouldn't have loved

When will I forget you?

Foolishly, I guess I loved you so foolishly

Because of you, I can't even dream of another love

I'm a fool that only knows you - what do you want me to do?

Severely, I guess we broke up so severely

What's so hard about saying goodbye that I can't even open my lips and am hesitating?

Severely, I guess we broke up so severely

You remain deeper than a scar in my heart so I can't erase you

~HOLD BACK THE TEARS~

 the very beginning of my new semester...

i shall have said things are going quite well...

the only exception are the piles of assignments,tasks,and topics...

which have to be cover in this short sem..

only 8 weeks...

and they are actually expecting us to accomplish this -mission impossible-...

sigh***


what to do ?
hmmm,the only solution is by working fuuuuuking hard this time...
oops,sorry for being abusive...
only if u can understand me and I'm sure all the UNI students out there are just like me...
so little time,yet with all the overloaded tasks ..
im really pissed off with all this heck going...
i will just struggle through this sem...

for the sake of my future...

i had said this for hundreds of times...
its only the matter of practicing what i had said,...

yeah this is the marathon,taking place this Sunday at MMU...
im joining this fun too..

the winner will be rewarded with rm500...

teehee...
yeah im aiming for this...

such a joke..

of course im not going to win this..

hopefully at least can get the consolation prize...

duhhh,giving up before trying...

yes,we should have great believe in ourself that things are going to be well...

in the way,though the beginning may be hard..

but sail through this and u will survive stronger,tougher....

*WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU MAKES YOU STRONGER

~.cHEERS.~